Higher Expectations.

Let me go through the last, oh 4 months of my involvement with japanese women.

about 3 and 1/2 months ago, my girlfriend of the past of some 4 years, who i saw whenever possible when she came back to japan from overseas, greatly disappointed me. She calls me one day after not calling for a week. I ask her why, she says that she is "bored". I tell her never to call me after not talking for a week then giving that as an answer. In the following days I then get into a more serious conversation in the following days. Do you see a future for us. It turns into im good enough to fuck for my english but not good enough to meet the parents. After 5 years. So i basically for the first time semi-put my foot down and tell her if she only calls me because she is bored, dont call me.

She hasnt called me in two months (and she is in japan where she can call me for free).

I dont know how you can spend so long with someone and still not know them. I though she had a heart, but she is more interested in how she looks, how many friends she has, having fun, and listening to new music videos. I though there was more there, but after accomidating her stay in fukuoka for a week, i get this. A shallow, empty, vain, superficial girl who longs for a guy that had sex so rough with her that even gentle sex hurt her. But hes tall, can play basketball and can recite Jay-Z. I just hope she grows into a more substantial person.

But the new girl takes the cake. She comes to my house every weekend. She sleeps all day. Doesnt clean anything. Doesnt do anything. and she thinks she is doing me a favor. On sunday, while i spend the day teaching a private and coaching basketball, i come back to see my clothes still hanging outside, sink full of dishes, messing living room and her sitting on my sofa watching TV. She then has the nerve to ask me what we are going to do that night. What?

So i decide to follow the advice of a girl that gave the best advice for relationships that i have ever heard.

"When in doubt, do nothing".

So i got dress, played with the internet, call a friend and what not. We get to 9 o clock and she looks at me and says, "Where are we going to eat tonight?" It too hard for her to look on the internet or in a magazine and plan a place that she wants to go to. So she storms out and starts walking to the train station. After a day of work, my left hand throbbing (and yes i fear its broken), and the first holiday i can purely enjoy sitting ahead of me, i get this shit.

So i start walking after her, not chasing, more just walking to the station. She walks back towards me and snaps at me, hurry up.

Time to do nothing now.

So i walk to the store while she is ringing my phone (20 times in about 15 minutes), but meat to make yakiniku at home. Then i walk to hotto motto to by rice and proceed home. She is outside my door pissed. I open the door, she races in, grabs her things and storms out.

How is it i deserve that when i allow her to come to my house and basically sleep all day after a day of work? I cant tolerate that kinda shit.

For one day, i would love to see the true honest difference in walking around japan as a white guy. For one day, just to see the difference.

One day this girl looked at me and said "you think you are better than me, dont you?". I didnt reply, but if i can wake up at 7 on a holiday while you can sleep till 12. Then look at me and ask what will we eat? If i can cook dinner for you 2 weeks in a row and you not manage the time the make one meal in 4 days? I come home after working and start cleaning and washing clothes while you watch tv.

Damn japan. Is this the best you have to offer an intelligent black man? There must be better out there, and no japanese women, i am not looking for a woman who is looking for a hip hopper.

Just a woman ready to be a good woman for a good man. And who is shorter than me and light enough for me to try several positions with. And has some intelligence. And a good smile. And a passion for something in life.

Im not asking that much, am I?